I will allow this person’s character to speak for itself:
As an employee of EdenFantasys, I’m quite tired of all of the bashing of the company, the employees, and the Community that goes on with cunt bloggers. I watch one actually go to people’s blogs and belittle and bully them in the comments for working with us. Way to stay classy. I usually keep my mouth shut because these cunts would gladly use it as another excuse to bash people (hence the disclaimer above). But you know what? I work damn hard for EF and our Community (as do the other employees), and I’m tired of these whiny and useless cunts beating a dead horse. Sure, I could avoid the shit, but the internet is a small word after all and things get around. [snip] I guess no one has clued them in to the fact that they are nobodies outside of their small retarded circle jerk of sycophants.1
This is who you are dealing with when you buy from, review for, or write for EF. Really, there’s nothing I could add that would make it any more clear.
- I am not linking to this ridonkulousness but you can check out nektca dot com if you would like to see the quote in all its resplendent glory. Be warned, however; the rest of her post requires a trigger warning for rape apology and violence. [↩]
Wow, what a cunt. Good to know I should have tried harder to prevent my own assault. Also, how is calling people who speak out about a company ‘cunts’ classier than someone telling true stories about a company that sucks balls to interact with? (A company, BTW, that was stupid enough to keep confidential blogger names and addresses on a googledoc that got leaked. If I kept my client records in a googledoc, my teachers would show up and smack me, and they would be right to do so.)
Aag, I love you for being brave enough to post this. And you’re right; there’s really nothing more to say.
I suppose I am a “cunt blogger” — I blog about things that go into my cunt, after all.
I saw her post as I was referred there by a friend. I read her rant and just clicked the little X button and went about my day. And did I miss something? Are we supposed to be calling ourselves ‘cunt’ now to make the word somewhat less icky? I missed that memo.
You can if you’d like. You certainly don’t have to. :)
So much for taking the higher road. *eyeroll* The best thing she could have done for herself and EF was to stay silent (or at the very most word a polite defense) and do her work.
I know this woman. I work with her and speak with her on a daily basis. And I can say without hesitation that she’s a dedicated, caring woman of the highest charcter. We have been “taking the high road” for a long time, sometimes on a daily basis. Our tongues are scarred and bloody from the biting we do on a regular basis. Everybody has a limit. Everybody.
It’s laughable that you, AAG, would suggest that a rant, obviously born of the frustration of someone who feels they have been wronged, would some how illustrate poor character. She’s frustrated, angry and bitter about people who hold others to higher standards than they hold themselves; who feel free to assault the character of others without knowing true facts of a situation. She’s frustrated by people who blindly perpetuate lies. She’s frustrated by people who care, not for the truth, but only about find the latest bits of gossip that might disparage those they hate. She’s frustrated by those who refuse to acknowledge they feel no responsibility to be truthful and feel free to spread their hurtful negative attacks under the blanket defense of the “right to have an opinion.”
Personally, I am tired of people do not hesitate to rant and rave against the company we work for or attack us personally and then expect that we’ll just shut the fuck up and take it.
“The best thing she could have done for herself and EF was to stay silent”… Seriously?
AS IF taking the high road has EVER mattered to any of these critics. She could have stayed silent, said nothing…it wouldn’t have changed the way any of them see EdenFantasys. She didn’t keep quiet and I’d venture to say that their opinions will continue to be as low as they have ever been.
It doesn’t matter what any of us do or say. Nothing changes; those who make a hobby out of bitching about this company will continue to do so. So why shouldn’t she vent, rant, say rude or harsh things if it helps her let off some steam? Why is it only the critics of EF are allowed to bitch and moan and travel the low road?
When EF pays me for the work I did in September 20008, then and ONLY then can you give out lectures about taking the high road.
EF can’t claim to “take the high road” after they’ve failed to pay me.
Sorry, try again.
Also? If “this woman” is “of the highest character” in comparison to everyone else at EF?
Well, I guess that would make a whole lot of sense.
Why shouldn’t someone use misogynist and ableist language? Do you seriously have to ask that question?
She’s allowed to be frustrated, but she’s not allowed to use sex-negative language while representing a supposedly sex-positive company.
Bottom line is she did herself a disservice by using the language she used and lost all credibility thusly showing the type of people employed by EF to be hypocritical at best.
She’s allowed to be frustrated. She’s even allowed to use sex-negative language.
We in turn are allowed to call her on it.
Laurel,
You are correct when you state everyone is entitled to their opinions. AAG does have a valid reason to have the opinion of EF that she does along with several other people. To say she or others ‘blindly perpetuate lies’ is an incorrect statement. Many of us have both reasons and experiences that have led us to form the opinions of EF that we have.
What you and other EF employees do when you write rants such as the one AAG quoted here is only confirm to many of us that our opinion of EF is confirmed. To call those who disagree ‘cunts’ pretty much sums it up there. Then there are her statements on rape which whether she meant to or not are victim blaming. Something you would never expect to see written by am employee of a company that is in the sex industry.
I’ve heard many times that these are your personal blogs and twitter accounts so you should be allowed to write whatever you want. You’re right to an extent. Many of you use your personal sites and twitter accounts to promote yourselves as EF employees. In the world of social media you are branding yourselves as EF employees.
I don’t understand why you care what these critics have to say about EF. Is it affecting EF’s bottom line or reputation? Is it affecting your job with EF? If not, then why do you and other EF employees add fuel to these internet fires by tweeting, posting and commenting on them? It seems like a total waste of time.
You are also correct when you state that is doesn’t matter what any of you do or say. Nothing will change. The only person who can change that is Fred. It is Fred who will have to change his policy of linking back to sites among several other things.
You ask, “Why is it only critics of EF are allowed to bitch and moan and travel the low road?”
The simple answer is because we do not work with or are associated with EF. We are not the face or voice of EF and therefore if we call people cunts no one is going to give a shit except other bloggers who take offense to that word. When an EF employee writes something so negative it tells a potential customer that if you are unhappy with your service at EF this is how they respond.
In the few years that I’ve been a blogger and gotten to know the sex positive businesses out there it has always amazed me that EF employees are the only ones I see who are so negative online and I have to wonder why that is. Why don’t I see employees of GoodVibes, Babeland, Fascinations Fun writing such negatvie posts? Is that the impression you all want to put out there in the public forum of EF?
I agree with what you’ve said for the most part (Omg! Sycophantic!) but I disagree (Omg! How can that be!) with one thing:
Every EF person from Fred on down has the absolute right to call people cunts, blame women for their own assaults and talk about hitting women. If they feel this way they should certainly be allowed to express it.
However, they shouldn’t act surprised when they are criticized for their words.
They have the legal right. However, it is staggeringly unprofessional. I can’t think of any other company that would allow the “faces” and “voices” of the company to get away with it.
And to have employees do this, without any repercussions from above, demonstrates what kind of company EF is. It shows that EF implicitly endorses these views. Otherwise they wouldn’t keep hiring people who do it, defending them, and never disavowing their words.
Those that rant, rave, name-call and are generally hypocrites BUT IN DEFENSE OF the company are generally patted on the back. It doesn’t matter that the post was intended to only offend those that she was targeting with her words, it actuality it offended probably more than just the intended audience.
Those that rant and rave or even just rant a little BUT AGAINST the company, well they are called out and either fired or banned from the forums.
All I can say is that I’m thankful that my primary contact at EF actually IS a very lovely person. If the one quoted above was my contact person I’d have given up long ago.
Wow. Aren’t they supposed to be a sex friendly company? Why throw the word ‘cunt’ around with such abandon as an insult. Don’t they get that that’s a word for something good? Stupid, stupid, stupid.
I couldn’t take this very seriously, all that kept coming to mind was this post by The Oatmeal.
http://theoatmeal.com/comics/c_word
And presumably at some point in the not too distant future, all could go horribly wrong for this employee and her relationship with her (for the moment) employers.
I am proud to be a reader of a cunt blogger. Does that make ME special too?
LOL
People who agree with people with whom you disagree, or who just happen to like the same things that those with whom you disagree like, are all sycophants. From the Arguing On The Internet section of the SAT vocab list.
I’d say I like your comment but what would that make me? :)
Would it had been better if she had used the term “bitches” insted of cunt?
Yes, that would have been approximately 14.72% less objectionable.
I’ll be impressed and might even start taking people seriously when the hypocrisy all around ends. I get why -some- people have issues with EF. I get it, really I do. If I had gripes with a former employer, I’d be pissed. At some point though, it’s time to get over it. Holding a grudge is not going to get you paid, so there is no use waiting in the wings for every single mis-step the company, it’s employees, or the companies who sell their products through them make. To boot, we don’t know EF side of the story in regards to their disgruntled ex-employees because it’s illegal for them to discuss such things. So those that have issues can say whatever they please about the company without fear of having that challenged by any facts surrounding their employment history with them.
People have a right to do what they want to outside of their job and to have personalities and personal lives. We all lose our shit when we find out someone was held accountable, fired, or whatever due to their sex blog or working in the sex industry. Yes, you may find what Kristi said to be incredibly offensive and that’s your right, but it’s hypocritical to suggest that it’s got anything to do with her employers considering she put a disclaimer at the beginning of the post stating that it did not, in fact, represent them in any way. Dislike her as a person and for everything she believes, ‘call her on her shit’, but to equate it to be an attitude that EF and all of it’s employees hold is just being ridiculous.
Also, all the commenters here feigning shock and acting as if you have no idea what could have provoked such a verbal assault. Puh-lease. You don’t live in your own little world where the things you say exist in a vacuum. You are friends with people who are friends with people who work with or actually like people from EF. It doesn’t matter if you make your twitter accounts private or say things in private chat. That shit gets around. If you don’t want it repeated, don’t say it. Otherwise, stop acting surprised when someone says something just as bitchy/catty/snarky as you did back to you.
“To boot, we don’t know EF side of the story in regards to their disgruntled ex-employees because it’s illegal for them to discuss such things. So those that have issues can say whatever they please about the company without fear of having that challenged by any facts surrounding their employment history with them.”
That’s really kind of funny because illegal or not, EF did comment both publicly and privately on why I was fired. Of course their version of events was not true, but whatever. I know I’m not going to get paid by them, but does that mean I’ve now got to *like* them? That I should turn a blind eye when they continue to do fucked-up things?
There are three sides to every story. One person’s, the other person’s and the truth. Fact is, no one is privy to the truth except for you and EF.
Did I say you had to like EF now, or anyone affiliated with them for that matter? Anywhere in the comment? Not that I noticed. There’s a huge gap of grey space between ‘liking’ EF and actively bad mouthing/seeking out negative things to write about them. You could simply ignore them. It would do a much better job of serving your purpose, which seems to be not getting them traffic to their site and/or sales. You could wait for someone to actually -ask- you what you think about them and then direct them to your other posts about the company or simply tell them you don’t recommend they associate with them due to your own personal experiences. You could actively support their competitors.
Or…you could spend the rest of your life holding a grudge against them and giving them more attention whilst having a personal pity party with your closest friends and cheerleaders of the “I hate EF” fan club. Over what…a few hundred bucks and some hurt feelings?
I enjoy reading some of the things you write, but every time this shit about EF gets dragged back out it’s a huge turn-off. It seems really childish, to be frank, considering it happened 3+ years ago. I don’t like being made to feel like I should hate the girl who called you fat in seventh grade when I don’t even know her. There’s a lot of crazy shit that happened and that doesn’t matter anymore that still gets brought up on various blogs (not just related to EF) and I feel like I’m reading the diary of a middle schooler when it does.
Sure I could do those things, and perhaps some day I will. For the time being, however, it feels like the right thing to do to remind newbies in our little sex-blogging niche that the company with the shiny graphics and the aggressive outreach program is not, in fact, particularly trustworthy.
A few hundred? More like a few thousand, thanks so much. And I do my utmost to demonstrate honesty in all things. Three sides to a story? Yeah, that’s what every victim likes to hear.
There is more than one side when it comes to not paying employees for work you commissioned them to do? I thought that was illegal no matter what way you looked at it.
I’d just like to jump in here and state that I, for one, am very glad that you and others are not letting this get swept under the rug.
I started my blog just recently, came across a link to EF, and promptly got swept up in it all. It looked so very shiny and exciting. I immediately signed up for their affiliate/review program, posted their banners on my blog… and then I found a blog post detailing their long, long list of misdeeds.
There were so many different accounts of so many terrible things that I couldn’t possibly ignore it. I wanted to. I really did. They made it look so good. But things that are pretty on the outside are often very ugly on the inside.
I slept on it, and the very next morning, I deleted all of the links and banners, removed them from my Twitter list, and turned my attention to finding good, reliable companies who I could affiliate myself with AND maintain my integrity.
This isn’t about anyone holding a grudge. This is about ethics and integrity. Call me crazy, but I think that’s far more important than making money.
I appreciate that. I wish they were as shiny as they seemed. I really do.
My knee jerk reaction to her whole post is to comment something really nasty about her, and then be all like, “what? I thought you didn’t like all the positive bullshit?” Everything in that post got my goat, but especially, somehow, the way her “Tourette thing” about the “oppressive agenda” of people not liking it when you’re being an asshat all focused on women being flat-chested, fat, or ugly. Cuz you know, there’s calling people out on nasty behavior, there’s not being afraid to call a spade a spade, and then there’s being a ridiculous mean-spirited douchenozzle.
Why did that get me more than some other bits?
Interestingly, certain parts of the blog entry in question have been replaced with [Redacted]. I’m wondering if it’s actual remorse, or ass-covering, given the shit storm that’s brewing…