We went to high school together but would have remained ignorant of our proximity — a mere mile apart! — but for the convergent powers of Facebook.
As an unmarried woman with few compunctions against dropping trou as the spirit moves, I hide my light beneath the proverbial bushel when faced with married folk, especially married folk to whom I once was fiercely attracted. So I’ve watched this man going about his Christian, Republican, I-vote-the-Bible-no-matter-what way from a distance, never commenting on his Glenn Beck-inspired posts or his photos from the family trip to the Creationist Museum — a trip which, by the way, handily extinguished any residual attraction I might have felt for him.
But when this friend wound up home-bound for weeks following emergency surgery, I politely requested his address so that we could send him a card. That he gave; we also exchanged phone numbers and the promise that if he was in need of so much as a jug of milk he would call on the Mom Taxi to run him past the store. In good time I mailed off the card with a small surprise tucked inside: a gift certificate from a restaurant close to his house. Given my economic circumstances (read: tolerable, but hardly lavish), this would have purchased a sufficient but humble meal for his family, and given that “putting food on the table while sick” is one of my least favorite tasks, I hoped it would be well-received by his household.
It was. Imagine my surprise to come home to a message that rambled on so long that it finally was cut off by the machine. In it he thanked me again and again for the card and gift, explaining that it was the only one he’d received thus far during his illness. The only one, I wondered? How could that be? But the message was still running; he invited my family to visit him one day soon. “If you and your husband are up for it,” he gushed, “we could even hang out some night and play cards!”
And now I’m left wondering if it can possibly be true that ours was the only gift; also, would the invitation to his house have been so generously extended if he’d known of my divorced, leftist, agnostic, polyamorous ways?
only one way to find out?
Mebbe he doesn’t keep up with facebook like some of us do. In any case, a fine way to remind that leftist atheists can be the ones you want around when the poop hits the proverbial fan.
Interesting, isn’t it? People like that often think that those that aren’t committed to Jesus/God/the Bible lack some kind of morality, yet of all the religious people I’m sure he associates with, it was the least religious of all that stepped in and offered help when he needed it.
Also, I fucking love that people actually visit the Creation Museum seriously. I really, really, really want to go so I can ride a dinosaur.
Divorced is common enough.
Just about everyone is left of him.
You might want to leave out agnostic. He wouldn’t understand.
Speaking of not understanding. Your polyamorous ways shouldn’t be used to fill an awkward moment.
Really? I can’t mention that?
Are you sure?
:)
I imagine polyamorous ways would certainly fill an “awkward” moment! ;-)
Shouldn’t…not can’t ;)
Of course it would still be extended, AAG! The better with which to convert you! Remember the story of the prodigal son. The more wicked the repentent, the more glory to the converter.
Send your parents over to play cards…. :-)
I second Elizabeth’s idea, send your parents over… some folks deserve the misery of their own kind.
And I wanna goto the creation museum too, and that was before I found out they had dinosaur rides!
Huh. I always find it amusing that it’s the heathens (like my Jewish husband) who are always coming to the rescue, rather than the “Christians.” I can’t help but wonder where his church is (surely his family has one, wouldn’t you think?). Seems to me his freezer should be full of donated casseroles or something.
Oh, I forgot. It’s the man who’s laid up, not the wife. Wonder if that’s the reason.
I’m as baffled as you!
Rather than cards at their house (tho I love the idea of sending your folks), why don’t you invite them to your place? Let ‘em see how the other half lives! Bet they won’t invite you to join them on their next family outing to the Creation Museum.
I’ve tried to avoid Traditional Orgy Decor. :)
Yes, he could have scared / bored /exhausted / turned everyone off with his overwhelming endless religious zeal, so much so that yours would be the only gift.
No, the invitation would not have been extended had he known about ‘your ways’ as you describe them. Which you know quite well.
You did a good deed by sending the card/the restaurant gift certificate.
It also doesn’t mean you have anything in common, or will ever share the same values as one another.
You don’t have to be friends to have done something nice. So let it go. His approval or disapproval is irrelevant.
You make your choices as to how you want to live your life. He does the same. Different strokes for different folks, and each person thinks they are doing what works for them.
it’s entirely possible that you were the only one thoughtful enough to provide more than well-wishes. having recently been through a time of serious illness, well-wishes are cheap and easy. on rare days i was able to go out and see people, i got tons of “oh, if you EVER need ANYthing you let me know!” offers. whenever i would call or post to facebook that all i wanted/needed was someone to just come sit with me or watch a movie or whatever, no one ever showed. people are big on talk, small on action.
Agreed — I was very ill with heart trouble a few years back, and I may as well have been dead already for how most people acted. And then had the nerve not to die. How awkward.