Before my fingers completely closed around the order of dismissal I’d turned to flee the courtroom, relieved to be released before the tears which had been threatening for the past five minutes began falling in earnest.
Someone slipped out from the gallery in front of me but I barely noticed him; by that point I needed all my concentration to avoid looking like even more of an emo fool than I’d already shown myself to be. Once out the door I made a quick break for the elevators but found my way blocked by the man. I thought it was an accident, but when I tried to sidestep him he mirrored my action.
“Let me see that paper,” he said. Boldly he reached toward my chest, to which I’d clutched the order of dismissal along with a huge pile of evidence that hadn’t once been considered in all the months of court dates.
I pulled away. “Why do you need to see it?” I thought through the haze of anger and frustration that he must be a court officer, stationed perhaps to point misguided claimants to their proper venues.
He straightened himself up. “I don’t usually chase ambulances,” he said, “but I sat in on your hearing. I’ve handled lots of cases like this one and I could help you with an appeal.”
He could have saved his breath. I was in no shape to consider such an offer. Even if I had been, how stupid would it be to fall into the arms of some man lurking outside a courtroom door without so much as a business card to verify his identity?
I said nothing, just lowered my head and kept going toward the elevator. “Can you just give me a minute?” he called after me. Every head in the hall swiveled toward him. “If you’ll talk to me I can explain why I think you could win this on appeal.” But the elevator had already arrived. As its doors closed I saw him dart toward the stairs muttering “Jesus Christ.”
Surely he’s not going to try to catch me in the lobby, I thought, but in abject misery over the outcome of the hearing I gave it no more thought. He, however, had not forgotten me. He accosted me again as the doors slid open. He followed me, yapping all the way, through the lobby and the courtyard outside. “My office is just across the street. Come see me some time,” were his parting words as I finally ducked into the parking garage and let the tears of anger and defeat flow.
In writing this I now realize that I should have handled him differently. The scene took place in an active city courthouse. Guards sat near the door to the courtroom; armed guards ran security screening in the lobby. How easy would it have been to turn directly to him and say STOP in a voice loud and decisive enough to attract the attention of every other patron in the building as well as the people with guns? Shouldn’t anger at his intrusion have taken over?
But having been not-heard throughout weeks of negotiations with the company itself and then still not-heard in months of courtroom back-and-forth, I lost my voice. I couldn’t speak. Given my interminable yammering on about saying no, I’m ashamed to admit that in the heat of the moment I could not do it myself.
Pathetic, eh?
What’s next for this case, you ask? I really can’t say. There’s only one thing for certain: Whatever happens, it won’t be with the guidance of that lawyer.
Oh my goodness, that is super skeezy! I am an attorney and that is a huge no-no (to use the technical term, heh). He could be disciplined for actively soliciting business like that!
I think that you handled it fine. But I cannot really get enough feel for what state you were in from your description. I really don’t know what is on the line, what is at stake here. A mere pittance, that means a lot emotionally, or is it a large sum of money which will make a huge difference in your and your families life.
Lawyers have a bad enough reputation w/o scum like this.
But, maybe he did see something. Perhaps you need to meet with another lawyer.
I agree, he could be on the up and up and while no, that doesn’t sound like particularly professional actions maybe … just maybe … there was something there that was enough to make him forget himself and act this way?
I don’t tend to go with the assumption that people who are overly enthusiastic or intent upon imparting some information unsolicited are ‘bad guys’ but …. maybe there was something more? Something that hit on your instinct for survival that turned you away from someone offering you assistance?
Just a thought.
Bree
who wishes you well regardless
I guess it’s the lack of a business card that really bothered me. If he were serious why didn’t he hand me his card and say, “Call me when you’ve had a few days to think about how you’d like to progress with this.”
?????
You both could have handled it a bit better. He could have identified himself. He could have asked questions. He could have listened. He could have given you some time and space. You could have been assertive. Said “No.” or “No, thank you.”.
I think you did do the right thing and not dealing with an ambulance chaser in a highly emotional state.
p.s. but you may need the help of a professional.
I respect your intuition when it comes to this particular lawyer, aag, so the only thing I’ll say about that is that as a lawyer myself (UK and NY qualified), I have sat in court and watched litigants in person with great cases get fucked over because they don’t understand a particular technicality or rule of evidence which the judge doesn’t realise they don’t understand or can’t be bothered to explain. Frequently the problem is that they turn up with evidence which is inadmissible because it is in the wrong form, but which could be eminently admissible if only they’d been advised on how to put it together properly. There are a million different ways to trip up a layperson and it is monstrously unfair. And there have been times when I have wanted to take someone aside and say “look, you need to do X, Y and Z” or “pssst, you need to tell the judge this”, although professional rules in the UK (where I practise) mean that I can’t. What I’m saying is, it is possible that he sat in court watching you getting upset and felt bad for you because he could see that you had a runnable case. But as I say, I wasn’t there and I am a big believer in intuition.
I would really recommend that you get some legal advice. Many lawyers do pro bono work so you might be able to find someone who would take on your case and represent you for nothing. Alternatively, there must be community law clinics and student-run advisory services that you can take advantage of. I would speak to the bar association in your state and see if they can point you in the right direction. You don’t have to do this alone and you are entitled to at least a hint as to whether you’d get somewhere on appeal or not.
Sorry about the dismissal. It’s possible this guy could have helped you, but he obviously went about it the wrong way. I’m a huge believe in going with your instincts.
You’re being too hard on yourself.
1. Unpleasantness
Sometimes unpleasant things happen. A car drives by and splashes you
with mud. A bird flies over and shits on your head. Some guy accosts
you on the way out of the courthouse. Unpleasant, yes, but you
couldn’t foresee or prevent it, and you aren’t responsible for it.
Separate the unavoidable unpleasantness from the assessment of your
response.
2. Assertiveness
You fault yourself for not being more assertive. But the fact is, you
were assertive–at the one juncture where it really mattered.
“Let me see that paper,” he said. Boldly he reached toward my chest…
And you DIDN’T. That left you free to continue on your way, and left
him scrambling to try to catch up with you. Many people would have
handed him the paper. That puts initiative and control in his hands,
like the hapless auto buyer who lets the salesman get hold of their
drivers license, and gradually realizes that the only way to get it
back is to either buy a car or make a scene, and, well, it just seemed
easier to buy the car…
And this wasn’t something that you thought about. You did it
automatically. When I was young and inexperienced, I got buffaloed a
few times by people on the street employing similar tactics. Since
then, I’ve learned. Either you’ve learned, or it came standard with
your brain. Either way, you should feel good about it.
3. Risk management
You argue that the physical security of the courthouse should have
enabled you to say STOP and make him back off. But that security also
gave you the alternative of not confronting him. If you are accosted
in a dark alley, maybe you need to scream and bolt. But in the
courthouse, the downside risk that you incur by ignoring him and
quietly going on your way is quite limited.
And confronting him has its own costs. It takes effort, which you were
justifiably ill-disposed to expend at the instant. It also has risks.
Maybe instead of backing off, he escalates. Maybe the guards decide
that since you are the one making noise, you are the one who needs to
be in handcuffs.
You may also be misapprehending the upside. On the rare occasions when
I’ve confronted someone (usually telemarketers on the phone) I’ve
always felt bad about it afterwards. (YMMV)
Humans are known to have poor intuition for low-probability events,
like winning the lottery or being attacked by terrorists, but at
http://www.schneier.com/blog/archives/2009/08/risk_intuition.html,
Bruce Schneier argues that people are quite good at assessing and
managing the risks that they actually face in their day-to-day lives.
I think you are entitled to view your response as good risk management
for the particular circumstances that you were in.
What happened to you, the losing of your voice…it’s a total metaphor for…wow, a lot. Sexual assault comes to mind first, quickly followed on a much larger scale by the “Nervous Housewife Syndrome” of the 50′s and early 60′s.
It’s a hard place to be in. Take heart… I think too often we worry about whether or not we did something right when it’s already been done. You did the best you could with what you had at the moment.
Not to b e contrary, but setting aside all of the behavior issues, I don’t see anything wrong with talking with this guy. If he is a schmuck, you can always get up and walk away, but I see no harm in giving him a chance to speak his piece. I know this whole matter has given you a bad impression of the legal system, but step outside yourself for a minute.
Let him talk, see what he has to say, then decide. Remember the notion, minds are like parachutes.
David
(I know I’m tardy to respond but was away…)
Actually, his tenacity sounds like just the thing you want in a fight! The very tactics you might not appreciate are those you want your opponents to not appreciate…
His NOT having a business card or flier or other marketing tool at hand, in my view, speaks more toward him not being a shyster looking for a quick buck.
(Having an office right across from the courthouse however, does…)
As for how you reacted “in the moment”, being overwhelmed by emotions is more commonplace than most admit. There are tons of times in our lives we wish we had a better reaction. There was nothing wrong with yours, nobody is expected to perform at 100% when they are undermined by a flood of hormones obscuring their functioning!
PS: I have no love of lawyers, even though a cousin is one, but they do serve their place. I’ve won in court without an attorney multiple times, I’ve not had to go to court due to a useful attorney, and I was not impressed with the results of another attorney. Either way you do yourself a further disservice my not exploring all options imo.
Good luck and hugs…