aag

Sorry you’re having one of those days/weeks/months, AAG.

I’d venture a guess that a trip to the doctor is in order to determine whether it’s the meds or something else. I can’t remember…are you seeing a therapist or counselor of any kind? That might be a good idea too.

Ever since my insurance screwed up my attempts to go to a counselor, I’ve not gone back and I know I really should.

Good luck to you!

Do you ever get tired of going to the doctor? I’m right where you are again but the thought of draging it all out for the doctor with vague hopes that he might this time be able to fix me is just to goddamn exhausting. And whats wrong with law and order all day? Personally I stick with Harry Potter or Lord of the Rings, but thats just coz I’m a geek ;)

While there is evidence that medication helps some, there is little evidence that medication helps much more than a placebo. At best, use them to take the edge off while you work on a more long term solution.

Drug companies tend to publish favorable studies and hide unfavorable studies, giving their drugs the appearance that they’re more effective than they are. This is especially true with anti-depressants.

I’m a firm believer in the “neurons that fire together, stay together” theory. Right now your brain is wired to react depressed to most situations. You have to force yourself to use those positive, happy neurons instead. It’s really really really hard at first, but gets easier over time. Eventually your brain will re-wire to react positively without much effort on your part.

I’ve been off all medication for 8 years now, and haven’t had a relapse yet. But to get here, I had to use discipline and a battery of cheesy, positive-thinking techniques over a long period of time.

Hang in there sweets. I know the feeling. Call the doc ASAP.

Good luck.

See the doctor, but keep in mind what Sem has written, IMHO he has hit the nail on the head, and if you can fight this without anti-depressants you may well be substantially better in the long run.

The up side of going through having to find new meds this time is that they should already know what doesn’t work with you from the last time you went through the process. So hopefully it’ll be less painfull for you this time.

I’ve been there and done that and have tried meds and extensive therapy. In my case it only works when I do both.

You have the email. If you need to unload, drop me a line.

Reading your post reminded me to take my Cymbalta. Hang in there. Get some sunshine, eat better and get laid.

Dee

Bah.

If you had posted about your high blood pressure or your diabetes no one would have chimed in telling you to cast aside your meds and just work harder to fix yourself.

Hope that you are off the couch and back in the swing of things soon.

aag, you said: “What if it takes months? What if it’s as painful as it was the first time through? What if nothing works?”

but, just but, what if you no longer need the meds?

i agree with Sem - these kinds of medications are designed to re-fire the brain, not unlike jumping a car battery. but a jump never lasts very long and eventually a bigger, more complicated repair must be made. i’m not suggesting that you get a new battery, mind you. just wondering if perhaps the chemical repair has been done and your brain is ready to go on its own.

in regard to trisha’s comment - i, personally, would suggest that anyone on mediation, whether for diabetes, high blood pressure OR depression, put in some work to heal thyself. simple things like eating right and exercising have allowed me to get off anti-anxiety drugs and stay off thyroid treatments.

I know how you feel. Hang in there. There’s something out there that will help you.

Trish, I was just about to respond “Don’t be so sure of that…” And then read nenasadije’s comment.

Sorry, my pancreas and my thyroid DO NOT WORK. At all. Haven’t worked since I was about 7 years old. I need medication to stay alive.

And speaking of thyroid… aag, I haven’t read all your past blog posts so I don’t know if you’ve been tested, but depression and hypothyroidism feel very very similar in a lot of ways. Even if you *have* been tested before, that doesn’t mean it’s *not* the thyroid this time.

Just my $0.02.

Oh, I know where you’ve been on both ends… I think even if your meds work perfectly, sometimes that feeling just sneaks up on you. I also think that you can sometimes have those days where you do nothing but sit on the couch, and that’s okay. Only you are going to know if it becomes too much.

I take two different meds (wellbutrin and celexa) and the mix gets me through, but I still have depressed days. It happens. It probably will always happen, but I just work on managing it better as time goes on.

i don’t think anyone is suggesting you can or should be able to “think” your way to mental health, aag.

i’ve suffered with a mix of depression, ptsd, anxiety and panic disorder since i was a teenager. i have a chemical imbalance. this much i know. not much else.

and i’ve done the medication thing and it would work for a while to create feelings of calm, assertivness, maybe even bliss and then would stop working leaving me flat, unemotional and sofa bound. i would find myself as frustrated as you seem to be.

for me, it has been easier to control the imbalance without the meds. there are other things i use to help me through the times that i am more imbalanced than usual.

my only suggestion is that you give those other things a try.

:-)

BAH x10! People are suggesting exactly that…many, many people cannot “think” their way out of depression; that does NOT mean you are not trying hard enough. Does hypertension make you a weak person? Of course not. Hang in there, aag. It’s true…now that you know what doesn’t work for you, it may be much easier to find new meds that do. Only you can judge what is right for you.

AAG, hope you get to feeling better.

AAG, what I was trying to say was…

1. Find another medication that works to help take the edge off.
2. Get into counseling. Medication doesn’t work alone.
3. Be disciplined, and get 8 hours of sleep every night. This is one of the biggest things you can do to keep your mood up. Cut out the caffeine, too. It disrupts your sleep.
4. Get regular exercise. Something strenuous enough to get your heart rate up for at least 20 minutes, four times a week.
5. Yes, “think” your way to mental health. It worked for me, and it may work for others. Being positive sets into motion positive things around you, which in turn makes it easier to be positive. It’s both mental and social. I know it sounds cheesy, but just give it a try.

Lastly, I know that all of the above is easier said than done, but it’s worth the effort. Be disciplined, and work at it. Over time (and I mean a lot of time) you will notice a difference.

weird…i feel much the same except that i’m not in bed right now…

wish i could reach out and hug you and make you feel better

I was on citalopram for a while - and it was like a dream drug for two years before everything TANKED. (I’d been on a number of different antidepressants before that - wellbutrin, effexor, zoloft, luvox, and the stabilizer trileptal)

I actually started feeling better once I stopped taking the citalopram, and while I certainly wouldn’t recommend my method (”haha I’m just going to stop taking them now and not tell my doctor for 3 months”), sometimes the drugs really do need to change.

Frankly I feel better now without meds at all, but your mileage may vary and etc.

At some point, you have to trust someone who has the training to help you. If it’s your doctor, get to him/her and get help, get new meds, get a referral, whatever. In the meantime… don’t beat up on yourself. If you need a day or a week or a month on the couch, then you do. It’s not something you’ve chosen.

Its amazing the shit that some people feel the need to put in their comments. Get offended AAG, every person who has a mental illness should be offended. I get so pissed off when people tell me to ‘get over it’ or ‘eat healthy and exercise’ as if that is a cure all. In case people havent noticed, noone likes having depression/bipolar/anxiety. It sux. I would give anything to not have it but just like someone suffering from cancer, I cant wish it away with positive thinking.

AAG,

So very sorry to hear that you are going through this. If your aching body will allow it, give yourself a pat on the back for all that you have accomplished while struggling with such fatigue. Please stop berating yourself for what you have not accomplished.

There was something you mentioned in another post that may provides a very important clue as to why your medication no longer seems to work:

Sex as a cure for back pain. Someone needs to write this up in the medical journals.

It isin the medical journals, AAG.

I do not know if the pain you experience is accompanied by inflammation of the joints. Even if inflammation is present, the muscle pain and debilitating fatigue may be due to fibromyalgia. Fibromyalgia, like attention deficit disorder (ADD), is believed to be a dysfunction of the autonomic nervous system. Both the pain and fatigue of fibromyalgia have been alleviated with the use of medication prescribed for ADD, such as Ritalin, Dexedrine, Cylert, and Adderall.

What does this have to do with your backpain? Sex can alleviate the pain by increasing the blood circulation and stimulating different areas of the brain, in the same way that the ADD medication does. Merely taking an SSRI will not alleviate the pain, because the problem may not be a deficiency in serotonin. The problem may be a deficiency in the the distributionof the serotonin due to poor cerebral blood flow. When SPECT imaging (Single Photon Emission Computed Tomography) was used for brain scans of fibromyalgia patients, cerebral blood flow was shown to be markedly lower than in individuals without fibromyalgia. In addition, you may need a medication that provides for the reuptake of other neurotransmitters, such as dopamine and norepinephrine.

I am including a link to a site that discusses this in more detail: http://addfibro.com/perspective.htm

Of course, you’re probably feeling too lousy to even read the back of the cereal box. A healthy diet and exercise b>will not cure depression, but they may alleviate some of the horrid fatigue and achiness. Based on my experience, the following really do make a difference.
(1) Eat protein, which provides the building blocks for serotonin. The SSRI’s will keep serotonin in your brain longer, but they cannot manufacture it. If serotonin is not supplied by your diet, the medication will not work.
(2) Take 100% multiple vitamin everyday.
(3) Take 2,000 – 4,000mg of high quality fish oil a day.
(4) Exercise, even a little will help.

Good luck, babe.

AAG, I just wanted to let you know you’re not alone; I have the “poop-out” effect on meds every 4-5 years or so and it sucks, feeling myself getting dragged down again and having to try something else and hope it works. I just pray that there’s a new med every few years to keep up with my disordered brain. Anyway, hang in there, and with my last med switch I never totally went off the old med, I tapered a bit, then took old and new together for a while, then dropped old and took new. Less of a shock to the system and it was effective. Good luck.

Interesting…not depressed, just occasional anxiety attacks. Been taking Paxil for about 8 months. Been off Ativan for 2 weeks. Interestingly, just decided to go off Paxil this past Tuesday…doctor does not know. Think I should do OK. The difference is that I have stopped concerning myself with the children;can’t always think for them. Also, I have decided that technology now permits me to indulge in being a voyeur, hence a new interest in photography.

Having long term depression and anxiety, I’d love to be able to just “talk” it away.

I have my own “Law & Order” marathon days, too. I think of them a recharging my batteries.

OMG! This could be my wife writing this post. The only difference is that this has been going on for the last 7 years of our marriage. As I walk in the door from work I see her on the couch I’m reminded of Jabba the Hut. This shit has got to end.

AAG,

You wrestle with depression along with zillions of others. Scant comfort though.

Oddly, regular exercise is one of the best things you may do for yourself. That along with getting your adrenals, your thyroid and your pituitary back into shape. Another poster mentioned hypothroidism. If you have been on steriods, they and stress tend to shut down your adrenals, and you then end up with a cascade as your thyroid and pituitary try to take up the slack.

Taking a good Omega 3 fatty acid supplement (prior post recommending fish oil was spot on) like fish oil or 2 tbs. of chia seeds along with a B complex 50 supplement may help.

If you like, PM me and I will send you the names, sources and quantities of some supplements that may help to kick start your glandular system and improve you mood and quality of sleep.

My spousal unit wrestles with it, too.