aag

This, like your other columns with intelligent butt sex pointers, is a winner. I really appreciate your wit while making good points.

E

I FUCKING LOVE IT! Perfection. Thank you :)

You know it, Chris. :)

While it’s unfortunate that these thoughts on buttsex don’t come naturally to everyone, I’m so glad there’s someone out there who is able to articulate it so well, with such a gentle and humorous delivery as well.

You rock.

I saw this (somewhat amusing) post on Best of Craigslist eons ago–might be a good addendum to yours…

‘If this thought makes you cringe, consider that perhaps that’s exactly how she’s feeling about stuffing your big ol’ sausage up there, you know what I’m saying?’

Best. Line. Ever.

I remember that CL posting! Thanks Miss Syl!

Thanks! I plan to take your advice.

I mostly think of the saying, “Do unto others…”

If I expect you to do X, Y or Z… I should probably be willing to try it myself at least once… ok twice… fine, you’ve got me.. *three* times… before saying I don’t like it.

Just now dealing with the issues of “oh, you like X… hmmm I’m not fond of it… but for *you* I’ll do it.”

Well written post as usual. :)

Thanks!

Dave

good post. Pute me in mind of Felatrix’ recent post on negotiating a blow job . She made simialr thoughtfull suggestions abot getting apartner used to the idea of blowing you. There was some comentary on the web about how, “what negotiation , shover her head down there.” I can see idiots thinking the same thing here. Knowing when something isnt working and STOPPING and doing something else is key to this practice. Even after years and years of practice, sometimes it eases in no problem, some times it is “soong wah!!!”

As is the case with what’s ‘hot’ and how it should be done, I suspect that much of the mindset of men these days…I’m talking the full gamut of age range…has been influenced by porn. (It’s so damned available, so different from when I grew up, it’s not only ubiquitous, it’s become an assumed presence. Like Internet use in the workplace!) Men see the most ferocious anal sex being exhibited…and let’s face it, porn-sex is just that, an exhibition, as ‘real’ as WWF stage-shows…and they’ve got their paradigm. We’re pretty simple creatures, many of us: not that difficult to influence us, not that hard to train us. Unfortunately, what the biggest current sexual influence on young, inexperienced men -Internet porn, obviously- does not inculcate is an appreciation of the most basic of foundations of good sex: intimacy.

Great post…even taking into consideration the negative slant injected. (No pun intended.)

A great letter, and I’ll add that as one who has been able to enjoy the butt-fuckery goodness for a long time, it is a great approach.

Including the willingness to let her reciprocate, and that, too, can be an incredibly hot thing- prostate stimulation men?

So true. Thank you for this. I am one of the lucky ones in that my loved one’s desire for buttsex was not quenched, but rather kindled, by the considerate treatment of a previous boyfriend. And, yes, she does indeed beg for it on occasions.

On a totally unrelated topic…that picture you have in the headline is sweet and kind of looks like one of those glass dildos. When you write a book you wont need anyone to do the cover art for you. I always got a kick out of there being these sweet and innocent flowers above a blog about orgies and buttsex.

“When you write a book…”

Oh god, y’all think I’m actually gonna do it…

THE PRESSURE!!!!!

Alright, so what do you do if your husband has already tried to “fuck your virgin ass tonight” - I’ve TRIED to try for him, but every time we’ve tried it he pushes it too far, too fast, and I wind up in pain. Then *I* feel guilty because I can’t “do it” like he wants, and then get frustrated when he turns around and starts trying to do it AGAIN When it HURT DAMMIT…

Any advice here oh Obi Wan?! Please - I’m begging!!

rofl

i love you
never change

thank you

okay that other kind of love not the fucking and getting married kind…. er you know :)

Dear Randi,

I suggest an ass moratorium until he either does some research into ass mechanics or otherwise gains a little sense.

:)

Dear Bad Influence Girl,

No fucking? Awwwww damn!

:)

Brilliant post, aag! This shall be required reading for all current and future “dates.”

Thank you.

well okay, maybe a little fucking ;>

but you know what i meant :)

randi: buy a small (i mean SMALL) dildo and practice with that… then use it on him.

Ooooooo I like that idea.

That IS a good idea, my partner had used her favorite toys on my ‘back door’ several times over before she suggested that she would like to be the recipient. It was her idea, I never pressured her into it. To me that is horribly wrong to try and force your will on your partner. BAD business that. I only pressure her to do it to ME. Which she loves, btw!

Slow and easy, until it is time for not so slow and easy. :D

Oh man don’t I love the not so slow and easy.

I love when you post about buttsex. :D

I love it that you love it when I post about buttsex. :)

if the first guy who tried to have buttsex with me had read this, really really REALLY read it, then i’d probably be a lot more receptive to the idea now…

Some years ago, my partner and I explored anal sex. We went slow. As a matter of fact, she, for a while would tell me to “fuck her up the ass”. Then all of a sudden, her interest was gone and we have never gone there again. She will not talk about it. :( color me sad.

empress 151,

I wish I had known you back then……

mitty

This is definitely not a first date thing to be trying. I Always found that a little planning got me in the back door. The first step was to use a little tongue action during 69. After 2 or 3 bouts with this, the next step is to use the tonguing followed by a thumb. Then finally with a little pre-cum for lubrication just work the penis head in and out ever so slowly. Finally after a couple of weeks work you are into ass slamming action.

Thumb in the ass, nice.

I needed a toy first to assure myself that it could be done.

Why is that I can’t help butt think the guys who really need to read this won’t ever see it.

Girl, you make me smile.

This post should be put on the preview to every video game sold.. maybe then it’d be in the hands of those who need it most.

Just a thought…

Show her that you’re willing to do exactly the same thing you’re asking her to do.

If ONLY it were that easy! If that were the case, I would have had anal sex with her a long time ago!

My partner-in-crime and I started with tongues, then fingers, then (small) toys, always with proper lube. When the big night came, it was easy as could be and maybe better for me than for him even! It helped immensely that he loves his ass filled as well. What’s good for the goose . . . A toy in his ass and my mouth on his cock - nothing better! And the fact that my husband and his wife would keel over dead if they knew just ramps it up even more.

two words, walter: no. lube.

i have since become a HUGE fan of lube. (luckily so is my fiance.)

those are good ideas for getting ready! i don’t think i ever had those… went right for the glory. it didn’t scar me for life, but probably because of my masochistic tendencies. i’m only recently learning to relax so that i can enjoy– and really enjoy it, not just enjoy it because i’m not enjoying it– *every* time.

LOVE this post!!!!

I’ve recently lost my virginity of buttsex and now I’m practically addicted! lol

Great tips and as always, very well said. :)

My wife possesses a cock hungry ass and she begs for it nearly every time we screw, but it didn’t get that way overnight.

It started with a lot of rimming, then fingers, then my thumb, then some toys, but always with a lot of rimming.

After about a month of this (we were screwing 3 to 4 nights a week at that point ) she started asking for me to fuck her ass and came the first time I put it all the way in. For the most part, we lube it up liberally, but lately, she’s seems to be in this pain kick and likes having her hair pulled and her ass spanked, on those nights she wants me to go in dry.

That was 8 years ago, and I’ve been fucking that ass ever since…

love it. I have been pegged myself more than a few times. I you want to have anal sex with a girl/woman you better be more than willing to take it yourself…kinksters!

I just became a “butt monkey” as my sexy cowboy calls me. (its all in humor) I am 44 been married twice and never tried it, never wanted to. I met my guy and the night we finally decided to make love physically I asked him for it. WHY? I dunno, because it was something I wanted for he and I. NO REGRETS! He had never done it and both of us at our age were like two 16 year olds in the back seat of a car on a first date. We have decided it wouldnt be on the daily menu because I just have an image of relying on depends in a year or two as a result but it will be a special occaision (sp) sexy activity. I feel blessed that i saved it for cowboy because it is a most awe inspiring experience. Definately an E ticket ride. I so loved this “letter” made me smile.