aag

Oh AAG, it’s not just your period. Your brain is being sub-divided, and I am so with ya. A word of warning. Watch out when you drive. A pre-occupied mind can be trouble when you’re behind the wheel. I’m going on 11 months, and some days feel as if this will never end. But I know it will and so will yours. Hugs!

You’re doing just fine, AAG. You’re way more eloquent on your off days than I am on my best day.

I’ve always wondered how it would be …

As an intelligent, rational, insightful person — but female. And the little push comes each month to try to knock me off my logical foundation.

I have a hard enough time keeping my footing on that wobbly fucker as it is! :-/

Being a girl is way fucking complicated O_o

Maybe that’s why I love you all so much …

Daria rules!

You’re doing great.

When I first studied martial arts I was also taught how to focus on A Block, or on A Kick, or such.

After a while, though, I was taught how to assemble a working combination. Fake the kick while I block and then through an uppercut that lays the fucker on the canvas.

Work on stringing together some good combinations. The additional exercise will feel great.

I do hope that you are finding plenty of time for healing. But in all honesty, I thing you’re doing great. And as much as it might seem like some thoughtless gesture form a stranger… ~Hug~

I know you will get this stuff sorted out - quicker than most. Give yourself a break - you’re in shock. It’s natural to be that way when you have set a big chain of events in motion. Just hunker down and get through it - you can do it . ;)

Will you and the kids qualify for Medicaid and Food Stamps?

Though… surely your soon-to-be-ex must still provide health insurance to the kids, right?

***

One of the hardest things about my own divorce and plummet into poverty is that my kids, particularly my two older girls, still remember when we lived in a nice house, with nice things, and they could go to the movies, and have birthday parties, and do gymnastics and soccer and all that stuff we can no longer afford…

It hurts my heart, always having to tell them No, that we can’t afford to get new school clothes or buy a pizza or go roller skating…

AAG, you’re doing fine, as discombobulated as your head may feel- you are an incredible woman, to be dealing with all you do and still manage to stay sane!

Admiring you a lot, hugs to you

Lately I feel the same way too - brain dead.

There are so many details, documents and crap to go through with a divorce, I don’t envy you, but I’m glad you’re getting through it, however you have to do it.

I am in the same part of the cycle and feeling the same way mentally, and I don’t have impending divorce to deal with. I do have the extreme mood swings, bordering on PMDD, and even meds don’t really help that. I just keep telling myself: “this too shall pass.” Don’t stop believing in the light at the end of the tunnel.

The cliche fairy has left the building.

i have no useful advice, but i do know that it will get a lot better when he’s finally out of your life for real… okay at least your house

as for the period… maybe you’re brain is trying to force you to rest? mine is too but it keeps waking me up in the middle of the night to stress out which is WAY irritating.

g’luck babe… hope something eases for you

you have so much going on in addition to your monthly friend….it is a wonder that gray matter is not oozing from your ears…i am sending happy wishes your way in hopes of you feeling better! xoxo

AAG,
I had some of the same feelings after my divorce, ie. how to pay for everything and still have a life. Obviously, I did not have the extra burden of a monthly cycle. I did make it through, and kids are grown and college is mostly paid for (still paying college loans).
“When you are up to your ass in alligators, it is hard to remember your initial objective was to drain the swamp.
Cheer up, it will get better.
Pete

aag,
i know this feeling all too well, certianly not the monthly visitor, but the mailaise is a good friend of mine. or, more to the point, was a good friend of mine, we parted ways awhile back. yes it was sad to see him go, but he was ready and i was certainly ready, so he packed his few belongings and headed out into the world, sauntering off into the distance. it wasn’t a sunset, but you get the idea. glamorize it how you may.

divorce is hard, no matter what you do. and while i’ve had a nice vacation from it for the last three months, it once again rears its ugly ass head. but now i find that the weight is gone, the mind is clear and it doesn’t seem such a chore this time around. maybe i am delusional, maybe i have simply forgotten how to capitalize? who knows, but i do know this much. time heals. and no amount of thinking can speed your personal clock along.

be of good cheer. i stopped by just to say hi. :)

Divorce is one of the most stressful events that we can go through. It’s a pain in the ass but where would you be without it? Still with him and suffereing even more? Take your time with it and limit yourself to an hour a day or less … it’s going to be difficult to make ends meet at times but you’ll survive and be better for it

Why should I need to lie down after I switch the power bill into only my name?

I would not worry too much about feeling exhausted after you’ve done something that is emotionally hard. It’s feeling exhausted without having faced that emotional hurdle that is a warning sign. That kind of tired tells me that I’m avoiding facing some painful decision. Experience has taught me that I will and I’ll waste more energy avoiding pain than facing it.

You’re doing fine, aag. You earned that nap. Enjoy.

Two things I’ve learned about divorce:

1. FIND A CHEAP CHARITY THRIFT SHOP RUN BY TIRED OLD LADIES WHO COULD USE SOME HELP AND SHOP THERE REGULARLY! Kids outgrow clothes almost more often than they wear them out. New or nearly new unwanted gifts come in all the time, too. Be there at least once a week for an hour or so, be helpful when you see any opportunity, maybe bring a snack cake or a jar of pickles sometimes, and I guarantee you that within weeks or months or years you will get to help unpack new donations, have first crack at things, and be given a break on the prices to boot. Mine feed me lunch too, sometimes. My new clothing budget for self and two kids has been limited to maybe 3 pairs of shoes a year plus underwear and socks (in some years but not always - new ones do come in). We all have more nice clothes than we really need, shoes,toys,books, appliances, glassware etc. for about three to five dollars a week. The worst part is that the ladies HATE vintage clothing. “Ugh, horrible! Throw it away!” I’ve seen some good stuff get pitched and let other good stuff go to customers just to keep karma happy.

2. No matter how miserable the last umpty years may have been, divorce hurts unbelievably for half again the length
of the relationship. Mom was right when she told me, however (though God only knows how she knew), that the pain is kinda like a mastiff puppy. At one year, it’s definitely still a puppy, but sometime before the second year you look at it and realize it’s grown up. Housebroken, less gangly and bouncy, not chewing and barking much anymore, etc.

Much luck and love to you