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For all the apparent confidence I might seem to have about buttsex, there have been times that it has completely terrified me.
Not because of the pain aspect. It’s never felt painful. Instead, I worry about poo.
***Please forgive me for discussing poo on a sexblog. If this squicks you out too much, go look at some pretty pretty pictures, ok?***
Rationally, I know my bottom is simply confused. It’s so conditioned to interpreting that particular sensation as needing to use the facilities that I get panicky when I’m first entered. I worry that poo will make an appearance, even though I know there’s none there. I worry even though I know that my partner would still like me even if we had a minor poo-tastrophe.
I know those things, and yet I do more than my share of panicking. However, the longer I have successful buttsex, the more my confidence grows.
Not long ago, my friend and I managed to spend several hours doing almost every single thing that a man and a woman can do to each other–except for buttsex. Not wanting to sully our record with anything but a complete performance, we set out to correct the omission.
I was so happily altered by our previous activities that I planted myself in the middle of the bed on all fours, not caring in the least that one hand and one knee wound up in puddles. I tilted my bottom up as he applied copious amounts of lube to us. I Zen-ed out while he entered me.
Once he was in me and moving slowly, I realized that I was not panicking. At all. My mind skipped right over the whole oh-my-god-I’ve-got-to-go feeling and went straight to the oh-my-god-this-is-fabulous feeling.
It was enormously enjoyable. It was so enjoyable that only moments later I was gushing down my legs despite the fact that I’d come about ten-thousand times not long before.
I gushed, and then I came in earnest. It was one of those orgasms that froze me in place and clenched every muscle in my pelvis. Apparently it felt pretty good to my friend too, because he wrapped his hand around my throat, clamped his teeth on my earlobe and moaned hard.
I nearly lost an earlobe and an eardrum but I didn’t care.
Let this serve as a note to my future self. Self, remember how easy it was this time. Don’t sweat that feeling of imminent poo-tastrophe. It’s not real. Remember.
You’ve hit on the reason I haven’t really ever explored much more than a few trial runs… there is always pain for me – but its slight.. its that feeling that freaks me RIGHT OUT.
That you ‘gush’ so much this way makes me think I need to further explore this… area, though I’m super paranoid… I’ve always been a ‘this is an exit only’ girl… hmmm.
That feeling? You mean the poo feeling?
Yeah, I know. But it’s all an illusion…
:)
Absolutely true
Wonderful.
Even the one time when there was an issue, I fucked her upturned ass and enjoyed every minute. And then she discretely skipped off to the loo
I had a bit of a spot on me Johnson, but who cares? It wipes off.
Hardly traumatizing
A wee spot-o-poo on yer johnson?
*giggling*
Yeah
A wee spot o’poo :o)
PS: I dig the big and the little tanned chix playing :o)
We could hang out and talk about poo all night long.
:)
That’s why dark towels were invented.
Shit happens, eh?
Yes, I own about 10 black towels.
:)
If, in the worst case scenario, poo did rear its head, do you honestly think that whomever was there wouldn’t be understanding, what with having had your bottom full of him quite recently?
I’m with Gadfly. If I didn’t want to worry about poo, I’d avoid the spot that expels it.
I’ve actually had two buttsex-poo experience, and ironically enough, neither involved my bum. Poo showed up a little bit and said ‘Hello! I’m here! What’s all this then?’
Both times, I just continued on my merry way, and just gave thanks that I always glove up.
(I sometimes chew my cuticles, thus sometimes have little cuts on my fingures. Though ungloved ass fingering might be the best cure ever for nail biting.)
As for my own bum; I’m sure there’s a bit here or there, but for the most part, I don’t think about it. I just keep a roll of paper towels next to my bed, right beside the lube.
I worry about poo.
I never would have pegged you as Whiny the Poo, aag. ;-)
Now that I think of it, you should start a series entitled the Zen of Poo, which would include oracular profundidites such as:
As they say, poolessness is next to cleanliness.
So… if suffering from constipation, have anal sex??
This has been one of my fears. In doing some research on the subject, there are some things you can do in preparation that aren’t entirely unpleasant.
I also agree with Gadfly. If that’s something that really bothers you, stay out of there.
Viviane!
I spit my coffee all over my monitor!
Shit does happen and quite frankly I’ll take the possibility of a wee sopt of poo over any preparations that include warm water and latex.
Butt that’s just me!
I’ve only recently started playing toward the back door. Actually just yesterday I bought my first butt plug.
Haven’t used it yet but I’m certainly excited to.
I have to say that your insights and openess have encouraged me foray in to here-to-fore untested grounds. Thank you.
Alright – if this is a mind over matter thing, I have a week mind. The hubby and I have done it a few times, and one time felt amazing, but I just can’t seem to get past the “ouch – ouch – mother-fucking OUCH” part…any tips?
Randi,
Practice on your own with a toy. If you want to. If you don’t want it in the butt, tell him to bugger off.
Email me if you want more.
A few drinks, or other narcotic of choice, can really help things along. Once we got over that initial hurdle of actually trying it, it was smooth(ish) sailing. We’ve tinkered with each others butts a couple of times now and it gets easier to relax with each experience. Yeah, poo can pop out and sure, it’s stinky, but it’s not going to end the relationship. If you can’t poop on a lover, who can you poop on!
I hesitate to recommend that people use anything during sex that might impair their judgment or enjoyment of the experience.
Well, if you are a kid you can poo on your mom…
:)
I’m learning to relax about it. But I have that same fear. Being with someone you trust is the most important part!
i have had the same thoughts enter my mind…luckily they disappear just as quickly…if my partner is grossed out by it all…then he does not have to go there!!! although, i like that he does! :)
xoxo
I know there are lots of people who freak out when it comes to butt sex. BUT … if you take your time, use lots of lube, have confidence in your partner .. it is wonderful for both.
Thanks for posting this
If you do it enough eventually a little poo will make its way to the surface. Question is Do you enjoy the experience enough to endure the down side. We are always making these kinds of decisions in life. Either that are go through life not enjoying very much.
If you know you want to have Greek sex, do an enema so you won’t have those brown cum drools in your panties. It also helps to push out as they push in…
I wonder how many men who love to stuff it in a female’s ars hole, would like to have it stuffed in theirs? Do straight guys have a clue what it feels like to have cum dripping out of your ass when you can’t control it for hours or days? Hum…
Lots of straight dudes love ass-play.
Too much drippiness? Use a condom.
I’d not recommend the drinking or narcotic – it’s better to be sensitive to any pain that does happen, so that no damage occurs!
Dan Savage has a strong point of view that any guy who wants to do a girl in the ass had better be prepared to receive from a strap-on first :)
I’ve had little poos pop out, and Lover makes the excellent point that if you’re really into anal, you are generally prepared to deal with a bit of mess if it happens. I try to avoid foods that give me soft poo beforehand, and make sure I go before we get going, but hey, every now and then…but it’s totally worth it.
For the person who’s finding it painful – yeah, what AAG said! And sometimes some penises are better suited than others, too – this is a place where a less-than-huge or not-completely-hard cock can actually be a bonus as you’re getting started.
Ah the butt. Yes, there is the risk of a little reminder of our biology, but boy can it be good. It can be so good! And… yes, what’s good for the goose can be good for the gander. Every time I post a blog about strap on sex, or pegging, or anything prostate related, my numbers go through the roof. Guys want to try it, but are terrified of losing their masculinity. Stupid? Yes. Valid. Yes.