aag

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I treat everyone like I am a guest in their universe. Deep down I am not threatened by other peopleՉ۪s universes because I am confident that my personal universe will not be affected. If anything, I might learn something and write about it later.

It’s only natural to wonder how truthful someone is, especially on the internet. God knows I’ve wondered it a time or two about different folks.

Over the course of ten-plus months that I’ve been writing in this venue, many people have written comments or email questioning how real I might be or how honest my words might be. I’ve been asked if I’m a man. I’ve been asked if AAG is a group of women bloggers. I find these questions charming and oddly flattering.

Most assuredly, I am of the female persuasion, and despite what the voices in my head tell me, I do exist in the singular sense. In small words, I’m a girl and I’m just one person. That was simple enough, right?

Now on to more complicated matters.

For many months now, I’ve posted the statement “Nothing in here is true,” which is borrowed (now with credit, duh) from the blogger Tony Pierce*. I tell you right from the start, in the first place you’d look when you enter my little home, that I give you no guarantees that what you read will be fact.

Perhaps it is, perhaps it is not. I ask you: Does it matter?

If I have written something about mothering that strikes your heart and makes you look closer at your own children, does it matter if it did or did not actually happen to me? If I have written something about sex that causes you to approach your lover with a new gleam in your eye tonight, does it matter if I did or did not actually engage in that act myself?

No matter what sort of entry I’ve written, I give you the heart of the matter. I give you the truth of the emotions as I’ve felt them. There are times that details have been obscured, places have been changed, times have been rearranged, events have been compressed and et cetera. None of these things changes the essential truth of the words.

All that being said, unless I have specifically said so otherwise, I have indeed done everything I’ve talked about here, though perhaps not in the order I’ve written or at the times I’ve indicated.

However, if you are moved to ask if what you are reading is true, then I most kindly suggest that you treat it all as utter fiction. I do not mind. I won’t be offended in the slightest if you believe that I’ve made up every word. Let it soothe your mind to think that none of it is true.

I suppose it would be different if I wrote stories about the health problems of my children, and then posted a Pay-Pal button so that readers could contribute toward their medical bills. That would be dishonest and (possibly) fraudulent. However, I ask nothing of you, other than your opinion from time to time. You don’t have to give me your opinion. You don’t have to come here. You don’t have to read.

You could even scan to see if anything sexy appears in a post; if it does, read and stroke away. If I go all emo on you, hit the back button forthwith! Scurry away if my emotional outbursts trouble you! Don’t let me keep you! Don’t let the cyber-door smack you in the cyber-ass on the way out!

Out of the need of my heart and to preserve some shred of sanity, I’ve written in here. You are free to read or not. You are free to believe or not. Neither choice will bother me all that much.

But I do wonder…is it all that hard to believe that one woman could have facets? That one woman could be deeply invested in mothering, and at the same time be really interested in sex? Are those two things incompatible?

Of course they are not, though it might be simpler to think that they are. It would be easier, perhaps, to think that a sex-blogger must be hott, and young, and write only about sex. In the real world, or at least in my real world, it is possible to be not so very hott, not so very young, and sometimes write about topics that only tangentially involve sex.

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This well-written disclaimer says it all for me; I suggest that you read it now.

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Oh, and by the way?

For people who have suggested to me and to other sex-bloggers that we focus more on sex and less on emotional things, or relationships, or recipes, or what-the-fuck-ever, I’d like to offer you the chance to get your own blog and have a crack at it yourself. Blogger is free to everyone.

Look, there are even directions on how to write the perfect sex-blog! It’s easy! Go!

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*Sorry, Tony, if you are reading this and are annoyed that I did not credit you from the start. I found the statement somewhere else and did not realize its original author until today.

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